There’s an idea you may have heard in your spiritual seeking.
 
It’s one I encountered in both my yoga training & in my Sufi studies. It goes something like this: One needs to choose a single spiritual path/tradition, for having more was like standing with one foot in one boat, and the other foot in another boat.
 
I tried that idea on for years. For years I expended incredible energy contorting my inner life into a singular spiritual path.
 
One of the reasons I found it so difficult is one you may relate to.
 

At some point in the journey of the female seeker, we realize that most of the established spiritual traditions were born in periods of time, and from places on earth where women had little or no rights. We eventually see that the beliefs of the time bled into the theology (who could they not?), thus making it nearly impossible for a modern liberated women to not have some serious grappling to do with the traditions and teachings.

 
If you’ll allow me to mix metaphors, trying to stay in one boat felt like trying to fit into jeans that were three sizes too small.
 
Eventually I got tired of grappling, tired of sucking in my concerns, tired of shrinking my spiritual instincts into a boat someone else made, in another time, in another place, for other people.
 
As Anaïs Nin wrote, “…eventually the day came when the risk to remain tight a bud, was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
 
I chose to blossom. To burn the too-small jeans. To dive into the water.
 
(That’s a three-layer metaphor cake – yum!)
 

I jumped, swam to shore & made my own boat – a kind of patch-work boat made of hand-me-down ideas from my diverse array of ancestors, sturdy lines of poetry I’ve collected over the years, recycled wisdom I’d read in books, enlightening verses from my favorite songs, vivid and symbolic images from fairy tales and dreams and meditations, carefully selected ideas from ancient sacred texts. I poured my heart into making a boat with all my favorite colors and materials from my deepest prayers and most precious memories. A boat with space to stretch out, a boat I could make a home in for the long journey.

 
The choice to make my own boat asked me to reclaim a radical trust in myself. I had to dare to trust my inner guidance, to trust my ability to keep myself aligned and attuned, to trust myself to be intellectually rigorous when interfacing with the ideas of others, to trust in my own capacities of for both intuition & discernment.
 
I wrote a poem-spell to commemorate the decision to finally sit on the throne of my own spiritual authority.
 
I had to let go of trying to do spirituality “right.” To not care if someone else thought I was an unserious, flaky, new-age seeker. Who cares what anyone else thinks? I anchored again and again in self-trust.
 
But here’s the rub: One of the down-sides of making your own boat is you don’t have the built-in community- the church, the synagogue, the mosque, the vipassana retreat, etc.
 
Weird, patch-work boat club anyone?
 

In the years since, I have been aiming to make our Circles, Training, Meditations, Festival & Community here at The Wild Woman Project specifically for women who have also made their own boats to come together – a space with some simple, yet potent guidelines to help in the co-creation of a dogma-free, judgment-fee, heart-centered space to listen to our inner guidance – together. To be in spiritual practice & respectful community without needing to buy into a whole religion or belief system.

 
It’s an ongoing creative project, one could even say The Wild Woman Project. 😉
 
Today, I offer my howls & solidarity to you, all the women who trust yourselves enough to make your own boat.
 
See you out on the water.
 
Love,
 
Chris
 
P.s ~ This whole contemplation reminded my of a New Moon Meditation Adventure from about a year ago, which I’d love to gift you: Download it free here. 💋
 

On the Horizon

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